I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
me + whiskey = a bad person
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
