guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
