I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize