Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Quick, to the slutcave!
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
