Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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