your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize