I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize