id be glad to
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
