Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
