Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
