Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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