What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
