Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
