Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
