remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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