Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
