I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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