dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
