No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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