ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize