It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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