Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
