smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
