Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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