once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
