I want to make a zoo with you.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
