Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
