Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
