I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
