How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
