Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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