Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Randomize
