It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
i out mim tonsoeep
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
