Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Randomize
