you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Randomize
