Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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