I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize