yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
