i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
