Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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