I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
