were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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