if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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