Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
how drunk are you?
Several
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
