dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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