I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize