that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Randomize
