I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Say something about gay babies.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
