Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Swine flu. Run for my life!
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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