YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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