That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
